I found them! I found my glasses!
They were on the floor hiding underneath some papers sticking out from the bottom shelf of my computer table. I must’ve kicked them in there somehow. How they ended up on the floor in the first place, I just don’t know. Must’ve been one of those “i’m-so-tired-it’s-already-2am-i’m-nodding-off-in-front-of-my computer” episodes.
I have been without my eyeglasses for nearly two weeks now. I’m near-sighted so I have been dangerously biking and driving for the past two weeks (please don’t tell!).